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Archive for June, 2013

Pride Of Our Alley

Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Dear Rachel,

To my amazement, Danny recently received a clean bill of health from his annual medical check up. I didn’t want to harsh his buzz by pointing out that this does not mean he’s immortal or has superhuman powers – as he seems to think it does – but I admit it’s a nice thing to know. Last year following a similar check up, I learned that I was both fertile and AIDS-free which, considering I live in London, are not only rare attributes to find in the same person, but are among the biggest compliments I’ve ever had.

Perhaps as a result of all this medical interest, Danny likes to take everyone’s pulse on a Saturday morning before trading to make sure we’re all in tip-top condition. From this I have discovered that I have a resting pulse of 57, which indicates excellent cardiovascular health, and that Keith’s is 75, which Danny puts down to ‘…having a tiny cock and a mrs that everyone’s had a go on’.

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